Ollie & Dot
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Feedback: Draft 2 Style Tracing Book Drafts Draft 1

Feedback: Draft 2

User testing sessions — April 30, 2026

Overall Highlights

  • Everyone engaged with breathing exercises and picking emotions
  • Nash (surprised) and Jarad (work craziness) made their own emotion for the scared face
  • All seemed attentive to the interactive page where the message was sinking in, like they were subtly hungry for the direction
  • Idea: blank bubble with a ? and a "name your emotion" prompt
  • Both kids curious about Dot's design — doesn't look like an obvious robot
  • Questions about why Ollie changes colors — maybe add a little fact in the story
  • They want Ollie and Dot stuffies

Founder Notes

  • Found myself wanting to say "the end"
  • Curious kids might ask to read the note for grown-ups
  • Maybe a note at the end could be the previous mantra: "Name it, feel it, breathe in slow — as you do it, you will grow"

Session 1: Lennon

10 / 10
Age 5 • 16 min read-through • First feedback session

Key Takeaways (from transcript)

  • Named the snails "Blueberry" and "Ash" — gave them full characters, tracked them page by page
  • Flagged illustration inconsistency: "Ollie does not look real on this page" — noticed the shift between realistic and illustrated styles
  • Multiple pages are missing snails or have snails that "look like a rock" — needs face/detail enhancement
  • Engaged with the feelings exercise completely unprompted: "I feel scared" / "Where?" / "In my belly right there" — then after breathing said "I'm happy"
  • Noticed a barefoot person in the street illustration — highly observant of small details
  • Printer binding issue — "pages too close together," some content getting cut off
  • Already mentions having a similar stuffie — she has the Jellycat octopus connection
  • Final request: 3 snails on every single page, "maybe like really hidden" — wants the hunt to be harder

Written Observations

Very into the snail search, wanted three snails per page, she was asking right away when she saw the pages before reading the book and named them, so she was excited to find them all.

She pointed out many of the rainbows whispering "rainbow" to herself, doesn't know they are also an Easter egg (she LOVES rainbows).

She called out her emotion without me asking her to.

▶ Full Video Transcription (16 min)
[00:00]Discussion about octopus color changes on the cover
[00:29]"So that's a draft two. Because this is our second draft."
[01:52]Setting up private reading — "We're doing unbiased user feedback"
[02:19]Reading begins: "In the warm sunny reef, in the wide sparkling sea..."
[03:05]Lennon mentions having a similar stuffie
[03:40]"Ollie does not look real on this page" — noting illustration inconsistency
[04:25]"This page lost a snail somehow. We'll have to add them back in."
[05:01]Snail hunting — "That one you can't really see"
[06:18]Snail search continues — naming them
[06:31]Interactive moment: "What do you feel?" "I feel scared." "Where do you feel it?" "In my belly right there."
[06:37]Breathing exercise: "Let's breathe in. Nice and slow."
[07:18]"He's a little abstract... We might need to enhance his snailiness"
[08:29]"He looks like a rock. He does look like a rock. He needs to add his face."
[09:01]"I'm happy" — emotion check worked naturally
[09:43]Book structure discussion — back page, inside covers
[10:25]Detailed snail review begins — tracking which pages need snails added
[11:21]Naming: "This one's a blueberry" — snails get character names
[14:53]"Do you have any thoughts overall? Ideas to make it better?"
[15:03]"I think you should put three. Three snails... on every single page... maybe like really hidden."
[15:55]"Ten out of ten!"

Session 2: Nash

8.5 / 10
Age 8 • 15 min total (3 videos) • Second feedback session

Key Takeaways (from transcript)

  • Explicitly said: "At all times it should be 3D. Make the whole world 3D." — not just a preference, a strong directive
  • Scoring breakdown: all 3D consistent = 9. + consistent character style = more points. + perfect print quality/glossiness = 10. "100% perfect" = 20.
  • Flagged Ollie is "a little too big" on one page — scale inconsistency noticed
  • Called specific pages "a cartoon" vs others that are 3D — the style shifts bother him at 8 years old
  • Said "not the cartoon one" — actively rejects the 2D/flat style pages
  • Binding quality was poor: "They didn't really do a great job with the binding. I'm going to get another copy tomorrow."
  • Some people "have a hard time with the noises" — sound effects (beep beep, zoom, clink) may not work for everyone
  • Emotion bubbles idea from transcript: "Those are the feelings that he's feeling... show it on the feelings page... what he's thinking about"
  • Wants to see the illustration progression happen — "You'll be here when I'm starting to edit all these pictures. So you'll see the progression."
  • Loves the hidden snail mechanic for rereads — confirmed it adds replay value
  • Asked "Where are you going to sell these?" — thinking about it as a real product, offered to distribute from his cafe
  • Mentioned wanting to see Mars book mock-ups: "Maybe I can generate some mock-ups while you're here" / "I would like that"

Written Observations

Wants to know who/what Dot is, is it a he/she? Is it a robot?

Wanted character consistency and more 3D realism style.

Interesting idea with the bubbles that follow him around through the book to show his emotions.

He said that board books are for much younger kids like 0-3 so I wonder if that format would deter kids his age, and maybe that's good for it to focus on younger for this one.

He said he really liked the book and that he could tell a lot of work went into it and that he is super excited for the Mars book, he is wondering how they will get there and if they'll take a rocket ship.

He likes the handmade style realistic art like the Hungry Caterpillar.

Unrecorded Observations

This week I noticed Nash struggle a lot with difficult emotions and expressing that his parents (who were trying to calm him down) don't understand how he feels when he was frustrated/angry/hurt. It made me see how much he would benefit and enjoy this kind of book. His parents too.

Both kids were curious asking about the Dot design and that it doesn't look like an obvious robot. I explained that it is a futuristic AI robot, based on how we think robots will look in the future and not how people thought they would look in the past, and how part of Dot's lore is that the sphere's surface is AI generated based on the surrounding environment and the user it's interacting with. They seemed to buy the story.

There has been a lot of questions about why Ollie changes colors, so maybe there could be a little fact about it in the story. They both seemed to want him to stay one color.

They want Ollie and Dot stuffies :)

▶ Full Video Transcription — Part 1: Read-Through (10 min)
[00:00]Setup — "Alright, you got a nice spot here"
[00:47]Noting the copyright page — "Illustrations by Beth"
[00:58]"They didn't really do a great job with the binding. I'm going to get another copy tomorrow."
[01:15]"Do you want to try to read it or do you want me to read it?"
[01:23]Reading begins: "In a warm sunny reef in the wide sparkling sea..."
[03:03]"Did you see this snail?"
[03:47]"That's a jellyfish. Right there."
[04:13]Interactive moment: "What do you feel?" "I feel scared." "Where do you feel it?" "In my belly, right there."
[05:25]"Woohoo! I felt scared and then brave. What a big day."
[05:46]"How are you feeling now? Happy, scared, sad or mad?"
[06:45]Post-reading discussion — "A note for grown-ups. It's all technology."
[07:03]"What do you think?" — beginning style discussion
[07:46]"He's a little bit big in this picture. Like Ollie is a little too big."
[07:56]"He looks like a cartoon." — inconsistency flagged
[08:01]"What do you think about him changing the style of the illustration throughout the book? He goes from like 3D to 2D to watercolor."
[08:35]"Whatever really looks real, keep it as one. One consistent. Choose one style of art."
[08:48]"And Dot — is it a he? A she? What is it? Is it just a robot?"
[09:06]"So maybe we should add Dot the robot."
[09:29]"I just think you should stick with one shade... like one color."
[09:51]Discussion about emotion bubbles following Ollie — "those are the feelings that he's feeling"
[09:59]"So maybe like show it on the feelings page... what he's thinking about."
▶ Full Video Transcription — Part 2: Style Deep-Dive (4.5 min)
[00:00]"So we start with this 3D world and see how the fish are kind of 2D painted and then we go into this 2D world."
[00:21]"What do you think about going from 3D when he's at home?" "They should all be matching."
[00:40]"So you think maybe we should just make these scenes more realistic in 3D?" "Yeah."
[01:03]"At all times it should be 3D. Make the whole world 3D."
[01:26]"If it's all 3D I would probably have like a 9."
[01:37]"If we have them all consistent style character maybe we get some more points."
[01:49]"What else would get it to a 10?" "It would have to be like 100% perfect."
[02:16]"The quality of the book is going to have an impact." Print quality, glossiness of paper.
[02:45]Summary: "More 3D, more depth, more consistency."
[02:49]"The Mission Mars ones in the house!" — excited about Book 2
[02:54]"I think it's like a spaceship." — imagining how they get to Mars
[03:05]"Maybe I can generate some mock-ups while you're here. So you can give me input." "I would like that."
[03:23]"My mission is to get it to a 20 before you leave."
[03:43]"There's going to be snails almost every page." "You like that hidden gem for the reread?"
[03:56]"Is this going to be like this again?" "No, this is a DIY version of it."
[04:05]"Where are you going to sell these?" "Probably bookstores." — distribution chat
▶ Full Video Transcription — Part 3: Wrap-Up (1 min)
[00:00]"Okay, so we kind of like this style."
[00:18]"8.5 out of 10. Pretty good for draft two. I'll take it. Thank you very much."
[00:29]"We're going to take all your feedback."
[00:30]"Is tomorrow Pablo going to read the book?" "I would love that."
[00:41]"We'll do another round and see what he thinks."
[00:50]Discussing next reader — excited for more feedback rounds

Jarad

10 / 10
Adult • Written observations only • "Ship it!"

Key Takeaways

  • Loved Clownfish Town
  • Engaged willingly with breathing and emotions exercise
  • Made his own emotion for the scared face ("work craziness")
  • "10/10 ship it!"
  • Suggested there be a note saying something encouraging at the end — after the story concludes, add something nice to the kids on the very last page

Written Observations

Loved Clownfish Town.

Engaged willingly with breathing and emotions.

Said 10/10 ship it!

Suggested there be a note saying something encouraging at the end. I explained the night scene was the end and he said "well then you have more stuff so that's the end of the story but then add something nice to the kids at the very end on the last page."